Break my heart, my baby boy is a month old. I've had Mondays that lasted longer than this.

And now that I am a mother as well as a daughter,  I can say without a doubt, that children do not know how much their parents love them, until they become parents themselves. As much as I can appreciate how much my parents gave to me or did for me, or how much I felt their love, I had to become Duke's mom to understand the depth and breadth of love a parent feels for their child.

So, on the first month rollercoaster ride, it's been a full-time party. No party hats or balloons though.

We think we're starting a routine. Then Duke laughs inwardly (because he doesn't know how to laugh on the outside yet, obvs) and refuses to eat or nap on command. The routine explodes and we're napping together on Duke's terms and he's eating whenever the hell he feels like it.

Speaking of napping together, that's our modus operandi. I'm cultivating a bad habit, but whatever. I like snuggling my baby as much as he likes being near me. He reaches for me, you guys. What can I even do? I'm rolling with it and I'll deal with the consequences later. Fair?

In more statistical, albeit less fun news, this turkey has put on two pounds since birth and a half inch in height and so he's officially rocking big boy status. Yesterday, I took him for a walk and ran into some well meaning and totally endearing older people who kindly offered me some rogue raspberries. Kind of them, but I said a firm no thank you when I saw that they were coming from his coat pocket.  Anyway, the man told me that they used to have a baby boy. I heard the "used to" part and kind of felt like, okay how do I handle this one without putting my foot in my mouth and sounding like an ass hat. Lucky for me, the baby boy grew up to be a man. "He's still alive," the lady said, playfully shoving her husband. I sighed like someone came back from the dead, which is apropos, given the season, but anyway, now I'm just getting dramatic.

So there we have it, our baby is a month old and still finding a million ways to make me fall in love.


I'll be back soon. I have every intention of blogging about my postpartum weight loss journey -- which is hellacious and so far every kind of stupid. Sounds fun right?!