You know, I've been thinking recently that maybe I'm not a writer anymore. Like I accidentally grew out of it and other things starting filling the void and now I'm really more of a Netflix Binger and Sex and the City Trivia Expert. Capitalized because obviously those are proper nouns.

But mostly, I'm a Duke Wrangler.

He recently learned how to hop right out of bed and scared the bejesus out of me. I'm extra paranoid lately (I'll get into that in a red hot second) and so surprises are very unwelcome. Last Saturday, he was just opposed to taking a nap in general, and so I did what I always do -- popped him in his crib, figured he was safe, and went about taking a shower for a second. Ten minutes later, that turkey whipped open the shower door, poked his little face in and said"Hey!"

I might have pee'd myself a little. And he laughed and just casually ran back out.

I'm trying to silver lining this whole thing because at least now he doesn't cry when I put him in there. He knows when he's bored, he can scale the rail, pop right over the gate over the stairs (!!) and be back in the living room just, you know, whenever he feels like it.

I am THIS close to getting one of those little leash things that I used to judge other people for putting on their kids. Parenthood is the great equalizer, I guess.

And if you wonder how things are going in general, Duke recently learned to say the word "boob", which he does frequently and if you're in for a real treat, he'll show you his. I ask him to say "please" a thousand times a day to no avail, but he hears "boob" once and he's hooked.

***

So going back to my recent paranoia, my friend Stephy introduced me to the My Favorite Murder podcast back in January and I am so obsessed. I have to take breaks because I have real nightmares about the horrible awful things that humans are capable of doing, but also I can't stop listening. I have become so vigilant about locking my doors.

In other news, I'm turning 30 soon you guys, and I have all these half written lists all over the my house semi detailing all the things I'm going to do to like, get my life together. Like, when I'm 30, I'll start meal prepping every Sunday. And I'll kick off an actual routine for things like cleaning the base boards and running the dishwasher on that cycle that's supposed to clean itself. Big plans.

Side note, it's about 7am right now and I can hear that Duke just woke up. I can also hear him "booping" his dad on the nose, which will eventually wake Ryan up and I'm just going to let it happen.

***

It's Mother's Day and of course, no profound words (duh) here, but I am grateful to be Duke's mom. He's just the coolest little dude and being his mom is the great gift of my life.


Happy Mother's Day to all the moms. I want to end with a quote from one of my favorite writers, Kelle Hampton, because it's words that so acutely describe what it is to be a millennial (and probably any)mom --

"We aren't defined by motherhood and thankfully have a number of beautiful things available to us as women that make our lives grand, but I'll be damned, I will die someday hugging motherhood as my greatest gift."