Summer's baaaaaack!

I have a post in my drafts about how that mother nature girl knows her calendar and hit the "Fall" button the minute Labor Day showed up -- or to be honest, a few days before because some over achievers think early is better than late -- but then we got hit with some 80+ degree days and I don't even mind.

Duke and I have some really important plans to beach it for maybe the last time this year, and get ice cream if anything is still open. We're going to make like it's July and just rock and roll with it.

***

Speaking of Duke, my little dude turned a year old on Wednesday.





The stunned look on his face when we sing "Happy Birthday" just cracks me up every time.


One is a pretty good place to be and officially my favorite age so far (but I say that just about every other week). He is talking to us all the time, babbles, but points too so we kind of know what he's looking for. The other day, he was crying pretty hard and I couldn't figure out what he needed. Then he pointed to the sippy cup out of his reach and calmed down as soon as I handed it to him, and now I'm convinced my kid is a genius.

Speaking of that, he clearly understands how the Apple remote works - sort of. He points it at the TV and starts clicking away and somehow, magically, 9 times out of 10, navigates to Sesame Street and I'm simultaneously ashamed and amazed at this.

Another fun party trick - he can open a toilet lid. So, we're in that place now where quiet is a bad thing. It means mischief is in action and a couple of days ago, it happened for a grand total of 2 seconds. I found my little sea turtle holding the lid open with one hand, and splashing away with the other. "Bath time!" I announced, marching up the stairs with that little turkey tucked under my arm.

He's just fun right now and makes us laugh a lot.

***

Bringing it back around to Labor Day -- it was chilly-ish, but still 100% pleasant.


My sister-in-law and I packed up our kids - hers are practically adults now - and went to Sleeping Bear. Too bad for the kids, there's zero wifi, limited cell service, and the moms were talking so much, we missed the road and ended up in friggin' Glen Arbor. We made it eventually, but only after the first "how long do we have to stay?" was thrown out.

 

My baby is a year old. God, how time flies.

***

I get now, why our moms make such a big deal out of birthdays. It's a day about him, but we're celebrating his birth and that is single-handedly the best day of my life. My birthday - who cares. I'm just getting older. But his birthday? Now there's a day I can get behind!

So happy 1st birthday to my little Duke Benny. The light and laughter of my life. I look so forward to the next year.

Sometimes we thrive, sometimes we survive. This week, I spilled gravy on my kiddo's face, and proceeded to just lick it off. Like having bandaids and a just-in-case diaper in my purse, I think this just means I'm getting in the swing of this mom thing. See? Duke and I are both maturing.

You guys, Duke is four months old and every day gets a little more how did we ever live without you.  He's right in the middle of what the internet wisely calls the four month sleep regression, and I'll be totally honest with you: yesterday after a day of 10-minute catnaps and a really early morning, by 7pm I was officially practicing the cry it out for five full minutes method. I was frustrated, tired, and really wanted to eat. And we totally had another rough night with about five wake-ups, but when he woke up this morning  just before five, I couldn't even be mad. He was so smily and giggly, I didn't even mind getting up. The way he looks at Ry and I when he wakes up is so so so worth it.

This month, he's picked up giggling. They're like happy little accidents though -- smiles that become too big for him to hold, so it just explodes out and it's the best sound I've ever heard.

He's also learned a little cause and effect. Throwing toys from his little bumbo seat with every expectation that we'll scoop 'em up and put them back in his hands. And then we do it again. And again. And again again.

We do not have a roller - yet, but we have a serious try-er, which I think is slightly more important. Persistence and tenacity, baby - learn 'em. He really wants it and has been working those abs every chance he gets. I think he'll have it down in the next few weeks, but we'll revisit at - gulp - his five month update.

Hey - this is fun -- my work recently enacted a policy that allows us to bring our little turkeys into the office two days a week. So far, we're only doing half days. Ryan scoops him up after lunch so I can put the pedal to the metal and get some work done, but I'll tell you, nothing motivates me to get on the phone so much as looking down at that little guy in his pack and play and remembering all the braces, summer camps and college tuition I should start saving for. Everyday feels like a good day to make a sale, but there's just something about remembering that a decade from now, there will be some equivalent to overpriced Hollister jeans that I'll need to buy ('cause m-ahhhhm, they're the only ones that even, like, fit me right.) to keep me on track, you know?



So now let's talk a little more about the sleep regression doohickey. I've read quite a bit about it, namely because I've had ample 2am time to catch up on my infant theories. Anyway, my great sleeper went from waking up once, maybe twice a night, to every hour or hour and a half. Seriously. My fitbit  kept tracking about four hours of non-consecutive sleep every night and this mama hit a wall. On Monday, Duke had his four month immunizations and came home rocking a fever that kept him up all night long. I really tried to be a functioning human, but the fever coupled with not sleeping much  anyway sort of made me think that death can't be so bad. At least you get to sleep. On Thursday night, I let Ryan take the baby and I went to bed at 7pm.

I totally woke up a younger, brighter me. Actually making it into the REM cycle will do that to you.

***

Duke is becoming so much more fun every day. He's not just a baby blob anymore -- he has maturing communication skills and is becoming more interactive every day. The trade off to being sad that your baby is growing up so quickly is looking forward to how much more fun they get with each month. I'm not into rushing it (except to get summer here pronto), but the next six months is going to get really good. I can't wait for baby babbles that start to sound like actual words, and I am really curious to see how the dogs react when the the tiny human becomes mobile.

***

Now let's talk about me for a hot second. First up, I have the postpartum bod volume 2 mostly written and ready to roll. I'll post that someday.

But every mother deserves to know that sometimes, after you have a baby, your hair will fall out in giant clumps and you will wonder if you're going bald. I'm still wondering and I'm still crying about it.

I didn't really notice that it was falling out dramatically until I started to see many many baby hairs appearing - think PeeWee in the Little Rascals. Then I got serious and started paying attention and holy shit, I'm about to give Ryan a run for his money in bald spottiness.

I kind of accept that there's not much I can do when my body just decides it doesn't care to have hair anymore (and can we make that decision about my legs too?) so I'm just rolling with it, breaking out the hats, and crossing my fingers that this will be short-lived.

***

You guys, happy Sunday!

Well, I intended to write a two month update, but then the days passed and I put it off in favor of changing diapers and falling asleep at 8pm and now here we are, a little closer to three months. And I just can't believe that my baby boy has left the newborn stage. If the last three months of pregnancy went as quickly as the first three months of his life, I would have done 100% fewer jumping jacks in the month of August.

So, let's talk new milestones. And I'm going to skip the boring stuff, like tummy time and muscle control and get right to the part where he belly laughs when we say things like "poop soup."

Giggling. It's on and I'm telling you as a new parent, there is no joy like hearing your kid laugh. I took this tip from Ry's sister, Kellye, because she's a working mama too, and with (close your eyes Kell) grown up kiddos, she's also a veteran -- she told me that she would ask her babysitter to never tell her when her kids did something for the first time. She didn't want to know if she missed it, so she just made like the first time she witnessed it, that was the first time. I'm rolling with that, and maybe Duke laughed for the first time while I was parked at my desk on some mundane Tuesday afternoon, but the first time I saw it was this week, so that's the first time it happened. You feel me?



A real and definite first, this Monday when I came home from work, Ry's mom was over and holding my sweet baby boy. I walked in and she turned him to me and said, "hey Duke, look who's here" and that little turkey gave me the biggest, gummiest smile, like he'd been waiting for me all day. If emotions could kill you, I'd be a million kinds of dead, because the drowning was real.

Going back to poop soup - let's call it PS - Duke went for like, six whole days without any PS and Ryan and I are freaking out wondering where all that food is going. Like, his body is tiny you guys and I have concerns about explosions. Whatever, he was going about life like it was no big deal and I'm ten seconds away from calling the pediatrician to ask if we need to perform surgery or something, and boom, fifteen gallons of PS. And another one of those little giggles.


My big boy is growing pretty dramatically. In the last three weeks, he gained three pounds and is hanging out at a hefty eleven pounds. Last month, I almost exchanged some Christmas pajamas that I thought he'd never fit in, but apparently he got inspired by the fat man himself, and started chugging the milk. Long story short, he's in the big boy jammies.

This little guy - he is just the absolute joy of my life. Ryan and I have been doing the love thing for almost a decade now, and I just remember feeling for so long that there is no possible way I could love anyone as much as I do him. But then we had Duke and it's like there's two chambers in my heart, each one has a door, and there is a sign on them. One says "Duke" and the other says "Ryan". The space has always been there, I just didn't know that my whole life, I've been waiting for Duke to fill it. Sometimes I wonder if there's more rooms, more babies, I just haven't realized I can't live in a world without.

You guys, lets just cut to the sad, sorry little chase here: Duke has given up sleeping today and it has been a giant shit-show.

Hold me, he says. All the time.



Actually, let me back up because he will sleep, for about ten minutes at a time. Until I set him down -- that's when the world explodes. So, I hold him. Permanently. Then he can throw down a three hour nap. Now, let's start with the cons and end with the pros, so we have a happily ever after, okay?

Cons:

• Zero percent of anything got done. I mean, I made a cup of coffee and that's about the extent of my productivity. 
• Tonight, we starve because I was supposed to grocery shop today, but with a baby who can't be set down, I decided that would be more bonkers than I can take in public.
• Baby cries will do a number to your sanity. Like, after several hours, it will wipe.it.out. 

Pros:

• Excuse to lay in bed and nap all day with the occasional reading sesh. I'm in the middle of A Thousand White Women, if you're interested. Four stars, btw. 
• I'm not going to complain about holding my baby in my arms or his desire to be there full time. Someday I'll miss this, so I'm soaking it up while I can. 
• Ryan golfed all afternoon, and felt adequately bad for leaving me alone, so he made dinner. He power-packed my grilled cheese and I ain't even mad. 
• We're bonding you guys. This is important, so that he doesn't forget who I am when I go back to work. Sob. 
• I've learned how to paint my nails with a baby in my arms. That's talent show worthy, if you ask me.